Honesty vs. false courtesy

Which is better: brutal honesty or friendly white lies? I want to reference “What Every Teenager Ought to Know,” a best-selling booklet by Dear Abby (Abigail Van Buren; Pauline Esther Phillips) that I sent for by mail in the ‘80’s. One section was on how to ask a girl out. “You and the Bell Telephone,” she wrote. For girls, advice “If Mr. Wrong calls,” was to keep saying, “I’m busy,” repeatedly, and “he’ll eventually get the message.”

Do people still use the telephone to ask out others? Or is it all email, FB, and text messaging? That would have made high school a lot easier.

I have a situation which I won’t detail here in which people try to be friendly, but they don’t mean it. I wish they would stop.